David Wygant Column
Over the course of his career, David Wygant has become a sought after media personality and has been featured as a dating expert on over 2000 radio shows. On television, David has appeared on E, Dateline, ABC News, CBS Good Morning, Inside Edition, MTV, Fox News, The Learning Channel, BBC, Blind Date as well as many other shows. In print, David has been featured in over 200 publications such as Maxim, Men's Health, Cosmopolitan, The Los Angeles Times, The Chicago Daily Herald, The Boston Globe, The Philadelphia Enquirer, New York Magazine and Marie Claire Magazine. Online, David has worked with Match.com, Yahoo! Personals, Lavalife and many other dating sites. David writes every Thursday. Read more from David Wygant here.
Attraction By Natural Instinct
Before you listen to today’s podcast, I am about to share with all the men something to which you need to really pay attention.
Yesterday on the flight home from New York City, I was sitting next to a guy who was wearing a pair of True Religion jeans. Every time he bent over or reached down for something, the whole plane had the privilege of seeing half of his hairy ass. I am not just talking “plumber butt crack,” this was plumber butt crack on steroids.
This is not something anyone needs to see . . . ever. Every time he moved, every person on that plane — women, men and children — were forced to see his ass.
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Ultimate Passion By David Wygant
This is interesting. How many of you live a life about which you are absolutely not passionate?
You go to a job. You date someone to whom you are not attracted. You may not even like your dog. Whatever it may be, how many of you can’t speak about your life with passion?
If you can’t, do you know why you can’t? It is because you are really not in love with who you are.
Passion comes from within. People who speak with passion, speak from power that comes from within themselves. Meaning, they love everything about themselves.
They’ve accepted their insecurities. They’ve accepted their fears. They’ve accepted all these things about themselves, and they have embraced themselves.
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Your Halloween Alter Ego
I know it’s less than a week until Halloween, and I want all of you to be prepared ahead of time. In today’s podcast I will tell you how you can make this Halloween amazing! More on that in a minute…
Halloween is the night that singles go out to talk to and meet characters who are like people they really want to meet. It’s also the night they go out as the character they’ve always wanted to become.
It’s really funny about Halloween. People get dressed up as what I like to call their “alter ego.”
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There’s No Such Thing As A Bad Day
Have you ever asked someone how their day is going, and had them respond, “Man, I am just having such a bad day today!” It makes you almost want to run away.
When I hear that I almost want say to myself “God, I wish I didn’t even ask,” because you know what is going to follow that answer. You know that if they are letting you know that they are having a bad, that they are also going to want to share everything that happened on that bad day with you.
They are going to bring all that bad energy with them, and they are going to dump it all over you. Having to listen to someone vent about a bad day is like having the flu for five or ten minutes.
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Are You A Mental Masturbator?
I rarely ever make a correction to any blog, but I have to tell you something. I can see why some of you are having trouble meeting the opposite sex.
You take things out of context when you read, and if you do it while you’re reading then I know you do it when you’re listening. My blogs are short, but if you want to get the whole message then you have to read them from beginning to end.
I posted a blog the other day that was titled “We’re Pregnant!” I got congratulatory messages all day long on Facebook, on the blog and in my email inbox. If you’d actually read even the first four lines of that blog, however, you would know that Sonja and I aren’t not pregnant and that the blog was about how men use the phrase ‘we’re pregnant.’
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You’re Not Bothering Them
I was with a friend of mine the other day who was in town visiting, and he said to me “I actually do see women I’m attracted to, but when I do I don’t want to go over and bother them. She’s probably hit on all the time, so she would probably be annoyed that I’m walking over to talk to her.”
So I looked at him (while keeping an eye on the road at the same time), and said “That’s your excuse! That’s your fear making you feel okay about not trying to go over there and talk to her. That is the way that you protect yourself from being rejected. You figure by not going over and talking to her, and by making up an excuse for her, you can rationalize in your head that it was not the time to go over and talk to her. This excuse makes you feel better.”
So he looked at me (because he didn’t have to keep his eyes on the road), and said “So you’re telling me that women would be up for speaking with me?”
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The #1 Communication Problem Men Have
The other night during dinner I came up with a quote I want you to read:
“Embrace change at my own pace.”
I embrace change at my own pace.
You need to really take that statement in and listen to what it’s saying. How many times in a relationship have you talked to someone and given them your point of view, and then expected them to just react right away?
Let’s say you’re dating someone and you’ve been talking a little here and there about moving in together. Then you say to the other person that you want to move in with them and you list all the reasons why it’s a good idea. Do you then expect the other person to immediately respond with an answer? Do you get angry if they don’t immediately react and respond?
So many of us spend so much time wanting people to react the way we react. We want them to react exactly how we react and do it when we want them to do it.
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Gods Waiting Room
I want to share a story with you that’s really interesting. When my step-grandfather was alive, he used to live in Fort Lauderdale. He used to say to me all the time, “The one thing I don’t like about Florida or Arizona is that so many people come down here to die.”
I looked at him and said, “What do you mean? Don’t they come down here to retire?” He said,”No, they come down here to die. This place is like God’s waiting room. So many people have just given up on life that they come here to just exist.”
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It’s The 4th Of July… Woo Hoo!
here’s something about holidays that bring out the worst in people. Now don’t read this and think I’m some sour, crusty old man who is a Grinch and who steals people’s pumpkins at Halloween. I need to let you know, however, that in terms of a social opportunity I think holidays are for amateurs.
Everybody gears up for three days out of the year: Halloween, New Year’s Eve and The 4th of July. The drunken women who are counting down “5 … 4 … 3 … 2 … 1 …” are the same drunken women who are going “Woo Hoo!” when the fireworks go off on The 4th of July, and they are the same drunken women who dress up in the hooker outfits for Halloween to tease all the men (and who you will see throwing up in the corner into a big plastic pumpkin!)
Holidays are a blast . . . hanging out with friends, barbecuing, sucking down a few beers, getting corn stuck in your teeth, and eating some low-quality hamburger meat. But searching for and thinking that a magical party on The 4th of July is going to yield you the social results that have evaded you the rest of the year is a crock of shit! The 4th of July is just one day. The expectations on holidays never equal the results.
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What Story Do You Hide Behind?
Today’s podcast is going to be really interesting, but also really short, because I want to be sure to get this message across to you guys. I’m not going to tell you exactly what it is here cause I want to be sure you will listen to it.
Before I go into today’s blog, though, a little update for you. Within the last week I went to get a second opinion about my back, and based upon that I am not going to have surgery.
According to this doctor, who is one of the top doctors in Los Angeles, my body can heal itself. Apparently what I have is really not that serious. The doctor says that the herniated disc and the fragments that are attached to it can heal themselves.
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Stop Speaking From Your Dick
Today’s podcast is all about speaking from your heart and communicating from your heart. This is something that really sunk in with me the other day during a conversation with my girlfriend. I really became conscious of the important difference between speaking from your head and speaking from your heart.
I was really irritated about something — I don’t know if it was something having to do with her or something else, but I was frustrated. As I was talking to her, she says to me “You’re so in your head. Speak from your heart.” So I took a deep breath and thought about it, and I realized that I was speaking from frustration (and from my head).
Speaking from the head (as opposed to from the heart) is something that men in particular tend to do when talking to women. We want to go and meet women, and yet we’re not speaking their language.
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Do You Suffer From Perfect Picture Disease?
What is the perfect picture mentality? On a Friday night, we go out with these amazing expectations of what is going to occur.
We think, this is the night; this is the party or whatever thing we’re meant to go to. We have this perfect idea of how the night should turn out.
You’re going to talk to the woman who had that college sweatshirt on two weeks ago, because you finally have figured out something to say to her. But then she walks in wearing a different sweatshirt, and you don’t have anything to say.
We have this perfect picture of the way things are going to be. And then once we arrive, the night progresses and reality begins to set in. When reality sets in, all of a sudden that perfect picture just disappears.
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