What Did She Say Again?

In order to really be able to connect with people, you need to improve your memory. So many times when you’re in a conversation with someone, you fade out and go into “Me World.”

Slipping off into “Me World” during a conversation could happen out of fear or out of disinterest, or it could happen simply because you fail to remain present. At the moment you feel yourself starting to go in that direction, you need to dial yourself back become totally present in that conversation (whether you’re talking or just listening).

It’s a really powerful thing to be able to just listen while staying present. It’s equally powerful to be able to remember things about people after you have a conversation with them.

At the end of every conversation you have with someone, there’s a a couple different ways to remember about the person with whom you were talking and about the things they said to you. One thing you can do is your phone and dictate on the spot four interesting things you learned about them. The other way is to keep a pad and pen with you, and to write those things down manually.

So how would this work? Well say that you were walking down the street and you came upon a mother with her young daughter. You say, “How come you’re not in school?” The little girl tells you it’s her spring vacation. You then learn that the family is going to Mexico for spring vacation and that the little girl has a dog named Max that she’s going to miss when she’s gone.

To work on your memory, at the end of this conversation you would dictate to your phone (or you’d write down), “Met this woman today who has a daughter. She and her family are going to Mexico on spring break. The little girl was so proud of not being in school, and told me all about how she will miss her dog Max while they’re gone.”

Do this for thirty days. It’s not that you need to remember all this about these particular people, but by doing this exercise over and over you will train your memory to be better. You can then use this better memory whether it’s when you run into people a second or third time, or whether it’s when you are out there meeting members of the opposite sex.

I did this exercise myself a long time ago. Now I don’t forget anything about anyone, whereas I never used to be able to remember much about anyone I’d meet. Really, I used to remember nothing about people I’d meet.

By doing this exercise, it forces you to remember everything because you’ve made recording these details into almost a responsibility and an assignment. Commit to doing this for thirty days, and you will be so glad you did when you see how much you’ve built up your memory.

Learn new dating tips and specific to-do’s from David Wygant at his official website by clicking here.