it’s REALLY funny you mention this: “What if you made a list of all the things you are afraid of doing? How about a list of all the things you’ve been wanting to do “someday” but have never done?” + live life to the fullest. You see, as a child I was this energetic, popular little boy with charisma (somehow I knew everyone, everywhere), but then…life took me by suprise and all kinds of bad things happened to me. Fastforward to pre-PUA. I had become a timid, introvert, quiet wussy man who pretty much disliked women and disliked life in general (got myself intro trouble too). Then a few things happened (my best friend died because of bad things HE did), and I realized I had to change. So I picked up this self-help book (not even related to the community) after reading David D.’s stuff first. And WOW…did my life change!

You see, the book talked about having destructive thoughts, alibi’s, excuses for NOT living, for NOT doing…and how with desire, persistence, a mastermind group etc. your mind would be able to achieve anything it could conceive and believe. I IMMEDIATELY grabbed a piece of paper and wrote down everything I was scared off doing: approaching and dating women, heights, trips by airplane, dogs (I was bitten several times by one when I was younger), etc. And you know what? I made an effort of LIVING the game, instead of thinking (or as some do: typing) it.
- First off I got approaching and dating women handled by going out alone, everyday and everywhere day game, when I got home online game, in the evening club game etc. Until I had my success
- Secondly, as soon as I did I realized chasing women all my life IS not my life…so I started picking up hobbies like car tuning, basketball etc. and combined the two…and I REFUSE to give up one for the other. I deliberately made an effort of having a life totally independent of the seduction…
- Thirdly, heights..the hardest one. It was summer vacation then and I just wanted to live my life to the fullest. I never even dared of facing the fobia before, I got scared at like…the second floor of a building! But you know what I did? I live in The Netherlands right…so I visited ALL the in my country recognized as highest buildings: the ‘Euromast’, the ‘Dom’, even went bungeejumping from that little plank! NEVER had the fobia again after it, period.
- Fourth, I went on a vacation at the end of that summer…and I could have taken the bus or even the car to get to Eastern Europe, but you know what I did? I took the plane…and even looked for a route that had a stop during the travelling time (so that’s 4 times take off and 4 times landing on that holiday). The first flight was absolutely terrifying, but when we got there? I LIVED, know what I mean?
- About the dogs, that’s an entirely different story. I googled my ass off and found 8 kennels in the vicinity of my home, visited them all…even went into a few cages to look my fear directly in the eye? And nowadays…I OWN…TWO dogs and think they’re the BEST pets to have in the world!

So…I’m DEFINITELY feeling you on this one buddy.