Comments on: How To Seem More Confident Than You Really Are

By: anna maria

anna maria — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 19:28:47 +0000

If a guy started touching me early I would think he was a slimy git with no respect for personal space or women. I think it screams desperation.

By: Studonc-

Studonc- — Sat, 26 Jul 2008 07:28:15 +0000

I was recenty at a club and the waitess was asking me a drink i played with her about what I liked to drink, and of course she guessed wrong, so it went to what she liked to drink which was what i liked to drink Vodka… anyhow then she asked my name I said I dont know ! then i asked her name she said i dont know ..
finaly she said her name was Terry and asked my name i said my name was DICK she really laughed ! then i ordered a drink ,, meanwhile during all of this she was not bothered by the fact that i rubbed up against her and held her arm and accidentaly rubbed her left breast. i held her and spun her around while i telling her my name as i wispered it in her ear…she was so responsive ..
later i saw her watching me as she walkd by and teased her some .
later i told her she was nice but could be be better looking
that seemed t o piss her off and she wouldnt get me a drink ..
so i went to the bar to get my own drink. and tased a girl who was there . i noticed her watching me ..
later i went up to her and told her that she was mean to me and she said I was mean to her and said i told her she was not cute and could be better looking.. i said No-way that i told her she was cute and she made me feel bad by walking away. then she was friendly again because she had misunderstood while we were takling I kissed her twice once on the cheek and then again on the lips. she seemed delighted. she apploligized for not getting me that drink…i played with her and walked away…
later i grabbed her and said lets go to breakfast after work …
she said she had a boyfriend and could’nt ..i said your loss…
and as I was leaving I ran in to her again and told her should call me and I was going to give her my card. she said ok, then I held her and squezeed her all over and gave her my card…kissed her again. and left..so I learned that being bold and a little intimidating can gain attraction from any women…. i know she going to call me and then ill play alittle with her and take out on the jetski and do the deed…

By: Dennis

Dennis — Sat, 12 Jul 2008 12:43:56 +0000

Scot you made a valid and good point with your “Empower her to be able to hang with your reality.” I always use that one myself to when I notice how a woman is taken aback by a bold comment and frankly, most of my friends KNOW me for my bold ballbusters and as such I had to learn this as a back-up plan. The reason why the empowering works is because if you feed her a fun line to respond with, you stimulate her to take part in the fun live in the moment kind of interaction and eliminate her ‘b*tch shield’ by showing her it isn’t ment to offend, but to have fun!

I agree about needing an internal frame/mindstate (inner game) to be congruent with the boldness. But when concerning boldness and her being bold by my example? I’m living proof! Examples:
- I went to this snackbar with a girl just after fuck closing her, but made a move that led to me realizing the boldness potential. We sat down and drank some coffee and had a burger, and stayed after to talk a bit more. So this restaurant owner guy, he already DEMANDED our orders as soon as we got in his joint in a very unfriendly way, my girlfriend needed to PAY for using the ladies room, and when whe were still sitting there while there were almost NO customers? The crazy man asked as to order again or leave because he needed the seats. You can imagine how she responded: I can’t believe this guy, he really offended me when I had to go to the ladies, he’s offensive, worst snackbar ever and blabla…so I acted on it by letting her know I didn’t accept the guy’s behavior towards me OR her (women find this VERY sexy, this protective boldness). Sounds crazy, but I went to the men’s room and did my number one allll over his floor, the flush button, the toilet seat, etc. I know…nasty and dirty! But when I told her she got turned on, and from then on whenever someone disrespected us SHE acted on it by making ball busting comments you wouldn’t believe!
- I also made more then one woman be bold by my example in the sexual department by just BOLDLY saying what my fantasies were, that I craved changing ‘locations’ for a change to have some exciting fun, etc. You would be suprises at how many times they’re bold by your example: almost always!

Btw…being bold = pushing your comfort zone, your limiting beliefs, to the max AND enlarging the comfort zone, which is a good thing. Why? Because in the future you’ll be WAY more spontaneous (women find this trait sexy), because you’re comfort zone IS being spontaneous.

By: dthomas

dthomas — Tue, 24 Jun 2008 03:39:59 +0000

boldness is great for giving her the ‘shock and awe’ and appearing confident for a brief moment. But without an internal belief that you can and will succeed, your body language will reek of incongruence and she will see you are not who you appear to be. And let’s not also forget that there are hoards of AFCs with boldness. It’s called intoxication. And I can attest from experience and observing others that drunken boldness paired with only physical escalation is more likely to trigger her ‘creeper’ alarm than trigger her ‘pre-selection,’ attraction switch. I am bold. But my boldness comes from a place where competence and past success comes through in my body language. It’s congruent with me. Looking back my initial “boldness” only helped me with one thing: practice You can’t practice unless you approach and approaching is BOLD. but boldness without competence will put you in the ‘every other guy’ category where LUCK is relied on and success is inconsistent. It’s a balancing act!!!cheers!
-Dthomas

By: Scot McKay

Scot McKay — Fri, 20 Jun 2008 05:12:32 +0000

Right on.

Women follow our lead. If we are tentative and nervous, they’ll feel tentative and nervous toward us.

If we are bold, confident and internally convinced a woman’s better off hanging out with us than not, then she’ll also follow suit surprisingly often.

The “boldness” factor from a leadership perspective is indeed key. If you empower her to be bold by your example, and follow that with encouragement rather than judgment when she follows suit, then amazing stuff tends to happen.

Here’s something fun to try out: If a woman counters a bold, risky statement of yours with something that stops you dead in your tracks for a second, VALIDATE HER. Respond with mild enthusiasm to her comeback as if she just passed a test. After all, if a woman can’t hang with you she’s not going to cut it.

You will be AMAZED by how she lights up, even if her initial response seemed apathetic if downright stand-offish.

Similarly, if a woman is completely taken aback by a bold or C/F comment, HELP HER find a comeback. (E.G. “Okay…this isn’t where you look at me with a blank expression. This is where you tell me XXXX”) Empower her to be able to hang with your reality. Bring the fun as a main course if the chick forgot to pack a lunch.

This is magical. You get in a woman’s head and stay there. You are a “benevolent challenge”.

By: Travis Bickle

Travis Bickle — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 11:00:23 +0000

Great article.

Even if she avoids the kiss or “rejects” you, she’s also gonna make images of “what if I did kiss him”, “damn I should have given him a chance”.

Just cold approaches are my sticking point but I remember doing an approach and the girl was really cold and neutral with me and I left her and she wouldn’t stop staring at me and my friends noticed as well. Just little stuff like this you notice AFTER you do stuff.

What I dislike about this article is it implies guys aren’t already confident. It’s funny because it doesn’t actually exist. You behave in certain ways sometimes and in other ways other times. You just wanna behave in ways that work to your advantage all of the time.

Overall great article!
Thanks.