The Fate Of The World (Twentysix)
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It seems that there is a major turning point about to happen in the history of the world surrounding Tibetan independence from China. I am no stranger to the news, and on a daily basis I can see there is some frequent worldwide protesting of Beijing’s hosting of the 2008 Summer Olympic Games.
Last week I saw riots breaking out as the torchbearer walked through one city or another, just to protest against China’s treatment in Tibet.
Is this really going to be effective in any way? Let’s think critically here and decide the fate of the world.
The entire conflict began in 1982, where Tibetan chocolate factory workers decided to strike because they were upset about the increase in health care coverage from the jelly bean factory workers across the street. In fact, it’s a known fact that Tibetan jelly beans are the best jelly beans ever made! They even have a flavor called “seat belt” which duplicates the taste of an old seat belt of a 1984 Chrysler Pontiac Excel car. Here are some other jelly bean flavors from Tibet you might enjoy:
Sour Apple
Cherry
Banana
Blue
Raspberry
Windows XP
Red Shirt
Corn
Poop
Dog
Encyclopedia Britannica
Orange Zing
Old People
Cranberry
David Suzuki
Soapstone
Chinese
Pad Thai
Star Trek
Telephone
Band-Aid Brand
Umbrellas
World of Warcraft
Lemon
Sand
Candy
Seinfeld
Happy Annie
97 Honda Accord LX
Beer
Feet
Irony
Civilian Casualty
Wrought Iron
White People Vanilla
New York
Listerine Fresh Mint
Stanley Kubrick
Storybook Gardens
Italy
Google.com
Grape
I think the above list is a very important factor in China’s independence of Tibet and it contributes to the freedoms that we experience as free people. I mean, think about it, who do these Tibetan’s think they are, trying to conquer China just as soon as it’s their year to shine? All I’m saying to Tibet is this: ease up on the human rights violations.
Haven’t they done enough damage already? Are they not the cause of the cyclone that has recently devastated Burma-also-known-as-Myanmar? You be the judge.
It’s not their fault that China handed all of their potential freedom to a select few people back in 1949 effectively destroying any possibility of democracy. But it is their fault for refusing to let the chocolate factory workers get a premium health care plan, just like those jelly bean workers. And I think most of the world media has forgotten about that!
And we all wonder why the world is so mixed up in this day and age of seat belts.
Popularity: 9% [?]
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Comment by 4nim4te on 11 May 2008:
Is this a joke? A routine?
I don’t find it too funny.
Try again
Comment by Flint on 12 May 2008:
Anime guy the man is hilarious! I’ like it.
Comment by Bargain! on 12 May 2008:
This guy is really funny. Amazing stuff.
Comment by 4nim4te on 12 May 2008:
myabe it’s the crappy news these days. I just don’t think making fun of the earthquakes/hurricanes are funny. or maybe it’s because i’m Chinese :p
Comment by John on 12 May 2008:
Good pickup artist, but pathetic human being.
Comment by Bargain! on 13 May 2008:
4nim4te: I dont think it’s making fun of anything. Considering it’s a satyrical article which contains no actual facts. It’s just adding some humor to a heavy situation. I think the world needs more of that.
Can you maybe explain how this is “making fun of” Earthquakes and hurricanes? While I respect your opinion, I guess I just don’t see the article the same way.
John: Have you met him? Why is he pathetic?
Comment by slingshot on 13 May 2008:
I agree with Bargain..
Comment by AJ on 13 May 2008:
This guy isn’t even funny…
Comment by Jack the stripper on 14 May 2008:
This guy is funny!! And what a great personality if u ever listen to him talking.
Comment by Matt on 14 May 2008:
A chick either gets your goofball act or she doesn’t. Or she doesn’t like goofballs. I mean is there such a thing as goofball game?
Thats what I like about C + F.
A guy who “gets it” and knows what is “lame” would totally bag the guy selling the “look me funny” routine/
“wow what a zany guy” </sarcasm
Comment by SeberianNightmare on 16 May 2008:
Matt, you are not a funny guy beacause you are acting angry. I wouldnt take advise from you.
Comment by Bargain! on 16 May 2008:
Matt - nothing you wrote makes sense.
Comment by Matt on 17 May 2008:
Hey it’s cool, guys. Just got my opinion, I aint planning on running a bootcamp!
Comment by John on 17 May 2008:
It all depends on what kind of women you want to attract. I’m sure 26 can get girls, lots of young girls (and older, but immature girls) will dig his personality.
But Matt’s right, that 26 tries far too hard to be “wacky”.
A women of quality who’s experienced a bit of life will see straight through it. Hell, if WE can see through it, what makes you think a women can’t?
Plus his whole identity (ie. his name ‘26′) is based upon the age he lost of virginity. Not very attractive.
Court jesters don’t attract women of quality.
Plus I didn’t find his trivialization of the Tibet issue funny, and to those that did find it funny - you deserve to remain virgins.
Comment by Bargain! on 20 May 2008:
With that logic, does anyone who watches South Park, SNL, The Office, John Stewart, Stephen Colbert or any other satyre-style comedy show deserve to remain a virgin?
Most of those shows (plus many more) “trivialize” some really devastating things that happen in the world, including natural disasters, human rights violations, wars, diseases, heinous crimes, etc. It’s part of comedy, and I dont think it takes away the impact of people’s suffering at all.
To me, this article makes me think about how irrational some world leaders really are, and that this conflict in Tibet should never have happened at all.
Besides that, it prompted me to do some real research on the entire situation and I’m now more aware of the conflict than I was before.
Comment by m0in10nz on 21 May 2008:
“It all depends on what kind of women you want to attract. . . A woman of quality”
What “a woman of quality” means depends upon what qualities you value.
A sense of humor?
Imagination?
Playfulness?
Wildness?
If your definition of quality includes “high sexual status and men putting her on a pedastal”…
if your definition of “quality” includes “job success and power and a very serious life”…
even if your definition of “quality” includes “high intelligence and an intellectually very serious job”…
taking her to that place in her mind where she’s playful and free can continue to generate extraordinary attraction.
And men who do it with true intelligence and real creativity are rare.
26, sadly, is not one of them.
I think John wants Catholic school women… the nuns, that is.
Comment by Scot McKay on 22 May 2008:
“With that logic, does anyone who watches South Park, SNL, The Office, John Stewart, Stephen Colbert or any other satyre-style comedy show deserve to remain a virgin?”
Wow…I dodged a bullet there, I suppose.
As for “quality”, I think that’s different than “qualities”.
The “qualities” a particular guy wants in a woman is subject to interpretation, as described.
When I talk about a “quality woman” though (which is frequently), it’s all about things like emotional stability, healthy attitude towards men, desire to do the right thing rather than manipulate/destroy, and trustworthiness.
Women who are intent on making a man’s life miserable only to cuckold him and take the kids/money/SUV later are decidedly not under the “high-quality” category. Even if they’re hot, fun, and like sushi.